The Egg War
by Glitterrock
Summary: Everyone learns the joy of Easter.


**The Egg Wars **

"Hey Krit it is almost Easter!" said Gwen happily while holding up an unlit firework.

"Gwen, why do you have fireworks? It's not the fourth of July." Krit asked tiredly seeing as she hadn't slept in four days.

"I love them,"

". . . ok well that's nice Gwen, go to bed your acting drunk, and all you've had is Kool-Aid."

"BUT I WANTED TO SAY HI TO GAARA!" yelled Gwen as she fell on the floor throwing a fit.

". . . I'll have a cup of coffee then we can go, and why do you want to go anyway?"

"I WANT TO SHOW THEM THE LOVE OF EASTER!" yelled Gwen as she lit one of the fireworks, which Krit then had to duck as it shot out the window.

"HOLY SHIT GWEN? WHAT THE FUCK!!" then they could hear sirens going off in the parking lot below, also they could hear the screams of there landlord.

"BOMBS IN THE MY BATHTUB, SHOOTING PIGENS, AND MY WIFES DOG, NOW FIRE WORKS!"

"At least we didn't blow up your car," said Gwen out the window.

"Uh Gwen. . . ." then there was a explosion in the parking lot. "It was going to be a surprise on Easter." said Krit as she shrugged. Then grabbing a cup of coffee Krit dragged Gwen into the other room ware they could open a portal.

**In Naruto's apartment.**

Naruto was eating ramen in his kitchen, when he saw two people climb out of his TV. Then one of them got up and waved at him.

"Hey Naruto how are you?" asked Krit, instead of replying he got up and walked into his room and shut the door. They could hear a banging noise coming from his room. "Umm what the hell?" asked Krit as they opened the door they saw him beating his head against a wall.

"You know that can cause brain damage?" said Gwen.

"Why are you here?" he asked.

"What? Aren't you happy to see us?" asked Krit.

"Every time you show up I become traumatized in some way." Gwen chose this time to hold up a basket full of chocolate and other yummy stuff, "But we wanted to share stuff with you." Naruto instantly perked up and grabbed the basket.

"We want to share the joys of Easter with you, but we need more people, go and get everyone."

"Everyone as in?" asked Naruto but then Krit handed him a list of people.

"We'll color all the eggs and when you have everyone here we'll get started!" said Gwen.

"Color the eggs?" said Naruto as Krit pushed him out the door.

Naruto then went out to find everyone, and while he was gone Krit and Gwen colored all of the eggs, all 900 of them. Later when Naruto had gathered all of the people on the list outside his house he went and got Krit and Gwen.

"Ok everyone here is what is going on, we are going to play a game, we're going to be dived up into two teams. One team will hide all of the colorful eggs, and the other team will find all of the eggs, there are 900 eggs you each have to find 100 and if you don't find your 100 then you will be punished." said Krit.

"I whana find them!" yelled Gwen.

"Ok I have a few questions, one why are we hiding eggs, two how do we know which eggs are "ours"? Three what wrong with her," Kakashi said pointing at Gwen, "And fourth why am I the only adult here?"

"Nu-uh I'm an adult I'm eighteen!" Gwen yelled before chugging some form of liquid from a bottle.

"It is simple hiding eggs is fun, there are little stickers with your faces on the eggs, she had to much Kool-Aid, and we needed to have a even number of people so you got dragged into this."

"Oh ok."

"Ok I will now read off the teams, Gwen's team, (the ones finding the eggs) are: Gwen, Gaara, Naruto, Shino, Kiba, Chouji, Shikamaru, Kankuro and Lee. Then my team, (the ones hiding the eggs) are: Krit, Neji, Sasuke, Sakura, Ino, Hinata, Tenten, Tamari, and Kakashi. Ok Gwen's team go and strategize in the house my team stay out here."

**GWEN'S TEAM:**

"Ok everyone, here is your basket. You need to find the eggs that are the same color as your basket. Out there, it is everyone for himself other then me and Gaara we are staying together for reasons only I know, and every one else, well yeah. Well anyway, yeah um okay in about thirty minutes until we can head out there to find the eggs. Oh yeah words of warning if you don't find all of your eggs, there is a punishment." Gwen smiled and grabbed her and Gaara's basket.

Thirty minutes later: The group ran out of the house other than Gwen and Gaara for Gwen held them back until the group was out of sight.

"What are you doing?" Gaara asked.

"I know where ours are hidden."

"How do you know?"

"I have my ways."

**Flashback:**

_Gwen and Krit sitting in Naruto's living room, "Gwen I'm going to hide yours and Gaara's eggs in the mailbox."_

_"Okay."_

**End Flashback **

Gwen opened up the mailbox to show Gwen and Gaara's eggs sitting in the mail box all 200 of them.

"What do we do now?" Gaara asked putting his eggs into the big basket.

"We go back into Naruto's house and watch the T.V. to see who is loosing." Gwen smiled and carried the basket into Naruto's house.

**Krit's Team:**

"Ok everyone we have to hide every ones eggs, now normally you hide them then and that is it; however that is boring and for little kids. Now your ninjas so here is your "mission," make sure they don't find them, use any means necessary to keep them away from the eggs. An example would be to have them explode before they grab them."

"Isn't that a bit dangerous?" said Ino.

"Well here is another rule, every egg they don't find they get thrown at them, but every egg they DO find gets thrown at you."

"If we destroy them how are we going to throw them at them?" asked Sasuke.

"We have doubles, ok everyone has 100 eggs of another person and we have about 25 minutes to "hide" them all; oh hell just keep them and chuck them at them when ever you get the chance. By the way here is another basket full of throwing eggs but they are the surprise eggs you never now what they might do."

25 minutes later everyone was hidden and prepared for the "battle". Krit and Neji went to visit Gwen and Gaara.

"All is going as planed," said Krit happily.

"Did we even really have a plan?" asked Gwen.

"Not really, but this is fun." said Krit as she grabbed a handful of popcorn, and sat on the couch. Neji looked at Gaara, he just shrugged and continued to drink a soda and watch the TV.

"Alright channel 1 Sasuke and Naruto!" said Gwen happily as she turned the TV on, when it came on it had the statistics of both of them, and an announcer _'Hello and welcome to round one of Egg Warfare, the first up is Naruto who will be finding the eggs that Sasuke hid from him. Naruto is in the right place but is having a little bit of trouble finding anything. There is Sasuke in the tree and,'_ It then showed a full view of Sasuke hitting Naruto in the face with a rotten egg.

This caused everyone watching the TV to start laughing at his pain. But then they noticed that Naruto had spotted an egg. _ It looks like Naruto may have found one. _ Naruto was about to pick up the egg, but it popped out legs and started to walk away, after chasing it he finally caught it; but it bit him and exploded covering Naruto in orange slime.

"Lets check on channel 2," suggested Krit. Gwen then turned to channel 2, where Shino's and Sakura's stats were on the screen. '_It seems that Shino has found half of his eggs and Sakura actually had one of her exploding eggs blow up in her own face' _it showed Sakura with blue all over her face, but she was still smiling as Shino's bugs were taking eggs to Shino. Then all of a sudden Shino's basket exploded. _'Well it looks like Shino is back to 0 on the egg count.'_

"Hey who is next on channel 3?" asked Neji now interesting in what was going on, on the TV. Gwen the went to channel 3. On channel 3 Kiba and Hinata's stats showed up on the TV,

"GO HINATA!" yelled Neji.

On the TV it really did look like a war zone there were black craters everywhere, Akamaru was plastered to a tree by tan goo. Kiba was on the ground trying to crawl to Akamaru. Then they noticed that there were eggs running around trying to tie him to the ground.

"DEAR GOD HELP ME THEY'RE GOING TO EAT ME!!" Kiba screamed.

"Sorry Kiba," said Hinata as she threw another goo egg that securely stuck him to the ground.

_'. . . . .you know what, I thought she was going to be the nice one, I guess looks are deceiving.'_

"That was great!," laughed Gaara.

"Who is next?" asked Neji. Gwen switched the to channel 4. Showing Chouji's and Ino's stats.

"CHOUJI YOUR NOT SUPPOSED TO EAT THEM!" yelled Ino. Chouji didn't reply just some brown goo leaked out of his mouth. _'that's just nasty.'_

". . . ." everyone just looked to Gwen and she changed to channel 5. Shikamaru's and Tamari's stats came up. Like Kiba, Shikamaru had been tied down only he wasn't trying to get back up. _'Come on do something!'_

"Well that is kind of boring, Gwen go to channel 6," said Krit. On Channel 6 Kankuro's and Kakashi's Stats came onto the screen . Kankuro's puppet had been dressed up like the Easter bunny and Kankuro was being put into a chicken costume by the walking eggs.

"HAVE MERCY I DON'T WANT TO BE A CHICKEN!!" Sobbed Kankuro as he was forced into a chicken costume. Kakashi was in a tree watching with amusement.

"Are you tapping this?" asked Gaara.

"Yes," said Gwen

"I want a copy."

"Me too," said Neji.

"You will both get a copy don't worry, and it is time for the last two," said Krit. Gwen then turned to channel 7. Ware Lee and Tenten stats came up, but what they saw filled them with horror. _ 'GET A ROOM YOU TWO!!!" _ On the screen Lee and Tenten were making out.

"MY EYES MY VIRGIN EYES!" screamed Neji falling backwards over the couch trying to get away.

"I think I am going to throw up," said Gwen, Gaara just twitched. Krit then pulled out a button and pushed it. A shadow started to form around them and it slowly got bigger.

"Krit's secret move, 4000 eggs of death" they were showered in eggs that exploded in a giant mass of yellow and green goo.

"They look like a giant booger," said Gwen.

"Well that is it Gwen lets go, Neji, Gaara, you can take the rest of the eggs and knock off anyone that didn't get egged; we'll be going now. Oh and here are the videos." Krit handed them each a video tape of the shows. "And those are full length so you can see everything on everyone. Bye, bye" then Gwen and Krit vanished.

**In a random apartment.**

"I'm glad that I had this extra apartment in case we were kicked out of are old one," said Krit.

"But we weren't kicked out of are last one." said Gwen.

"Yea but I don't think they wanted us to stay there."

"Are you sure?'

"Yea"

"I really hate Easter but this year it wasn't bad." Gwen said smiling before lighting another firework.

A/N: Happy Easter _ We hate Easter. _Except for the candy. _CREAM FILLED JESUES FOR ALL _ don't kill use please


End file.
